Please visit my new home

ini rumah baru saya

http://asojournersjourney.blogspot.com/

please do visit sometimes, thanks ;)

pardon my English, eh..

i feel the urge to improve my English. all of sudden, i realise that i write and make all the grammatical mistakes without any intention of correcting them or at least checking for a smooth flow of reading. i'm really bad at constructing sentences and i think i have the tendency to add 'ing' at the end of verbs whenever i feel like it. this is really a problem. whose fault is this ha? i put my blame on my course, for not allowing me to write freely, creatively and enhance my writing skills, haha. wah, another added task to my already long list. help me with my English, friends. now i feel weird with my own writing.- grammatically 'concious' mind, for now that is.

PUSS IN BOOTS.... meow~

tak tahan...hahaha

timbal balik

Rasanya seperti entri di bawah agak radikal pada mulanya. Saya sudah membacanya kembali dan memang ada beberapa tempat yang agak melampau kenyataannya, jadi sudah saya ubah supaya tak lari daripada maksud asal penulisan. Tak tahu apa yang saya fikirkan sewaktu menulis entri tersebut, hairan juga. Dahlah menggunakan bahasa Inggeris . Tapi saya rasa seperti membiarkannya di situ sebagai bukti bahawa kadang-kadang pemikiran kita di luar sangkaan diri sendiri. Sebab itu ada sesetengah orang mempunyai diari, apabila menatap kembali tulisan-tulisan yang bertahun-tahun usianya, pasti kita akan tergelak, entah kelakar entah terasa diri sangat bodoh dan tidak matang. Keputusan yang kita buat tahun lepas, bulan lepas atau minggu lepas, mungkin saja tak akan kita setujui pada waktu sekarang ini. Insan berevolusi, bukan SAHAJA pada jasad fizikal, tapi pada kematangan emosi, ketajaman pemikiran dan kekuatan rohani/SPIRITUAL. Kalau ada yang bertanya siapa saya yang kelmarin menulis ' some issues in hand' , maka saya akan jawab; "ooh, itu sebahagian daripada diri saya yang tak dapat definisikan, ada sesuatu yang bermain dalam fikiran waktu itu". Ada beberapa ketika dalam hidup kita, kita perlu menekan butang rehat, berdiri sebentar dan merenung sejenak- ke belakang yang telah kita tinggalkan - ke hadapan yang bakal kita lalui. Hmm, entah apa kena dengan Muslihah ~

SOME ISSUES IN HAND

i called my mum three days ago, and she was very much relieved to hear my voice and to know that i'm fine. it was my fault that i didn't call home for about two weeks, so many things, i was busy doing stuffs i thought were important. my mum sms me the day before my call, she wrote more or less like this ; is there something goin' on? is it intentional that you don't want to call home anymore? - umi. i was terribly worried with such a statement that i immediately bought a new handphone and called home the next day, just to wait for the right hour. the truth is, my seven-year-old handphone broke down and i didn't think there was any way possible to fix it. my father gave his beloved phone (in order to buy a new one) after i finished my SPM, just before i had my first outing to Kuala Lumpur without my family( to a camp) . so, basically this dark green hp had been with me for about, erm, let see...5 years ! i was thinking to wait for about a week before buying a new one, so as to wait for my allowance in as well. but things happened and now i have a sony ericsson w200i model in hand. not much for gadget manias like you guys out there, but it is more than enough for me, with a basic camera and also walkman.

so, getting back to where i started; i asked my mum , what did she mean by 'intentionally not wanting to call home'?- i have never had problems with any one of my parents, why should i have an intention as such? shockingly, she replied ; "well, you know, there are such organizations that when you joined them, you just shun from your family, it just happens all the time... " i was quite unspoken for a few moments, gathering my strength, i told her ; "insha Allah i will never let myself be a part of such thing, don't you trust me?" it was indeed difficult when it comes to your parents questioning your accountability. Alhamdulillah, for me it is not a hard one. it's just about me explaining my wherebouts for the last two weeks in details eventhough i've consulted my parents before embarking on my journey to programmes . but thinking back, how on earth does she get the idea of organizations that deprive anyone from his/her family? i know that she literally meant organizations related to extremism, maybe some Islamic movements etc as being propagated by the mainstream medias back home in malaysia. being a parent, she is concerned about my beings which is normal. but i really hate the use of extremism or the word extremist (in the medias) which is usually associated with muslims and pronounced with a negative connotation. i could not elaborate this any further, but lately i keep on hearing people ( of authority) reminding us of our duty as students to the country, society and not to forget, our religion ( it really annoys me whenever 'religion' is being put at the end of the sentence). oh, please...we have enough social problems with malaysian youths that i sometimes think 'their' (some external influences, not referring to family and friends) worrying about anyone of us involved in islamic movement is not relevant, REALLY.

o Allah, please guide me to the right path, please grant me patience in dealing with the questions in my heart...