i called my mum three days ago, and she was very much relieved to hear my voice and to know that i'm fine. it was my fault that i didn't call home for about two weeks, so many things, i was busy doing stuffs i thought were important. my mum sms me the day before my call, she wrote more or less like this ; is there something goin' on? is it intentional that you don't want to call home anymore? - umi. i was terribly worried with such a statement that i immediately bought a new handphone and called home the next day, just to wait for the right hour. the truth is, my seven-year-old handphone broke down and i didn't think there was any way possible to fix it. my father gave his beloved phone (in order to buy a new one) after i finished my SPM, just before i had my first outing to Kuala Lumpur without my family( to a camp) . so, basically this dark green hp had been with me for about, erm, let see...5 years ! i was thinking to wait for about a week before buying a new one, so as to wait for my allowance in as well. but things happened and now i have a sony ericsson w200i model in hand. not much for gadget manias like you guys out there, but it is more than enough for me, with a basic camera and also walkman.
so, getting back to where i started; i asked my mum , what did she mean by 'intentionally not wanting to call home'?- i have never had problems with any one of my parents, why should i have an intention as such? shockingly, she replied ; "well, you know, there are such organizations that when you joined them, you just shun from your family, it just happens all the time... " i was quite unspoken for a few moments, gathering my strength, i told her ; "insha Allah i will never let myself be a part of such thing, don't you trust me?" it was indeed difficult when it comes to your parents questioning your accountability. Alhamdulillah, for me it is not a hard one. it's just about me explaining my wherebouts for the last two weeks in details eventhough i've consulted my parents before embarking on my journey to programmes . but thinking back, how on earth does she get the idea of organizations that deprive anyone from his/her family? i know that she literally meant organizations related to extremism, maybe some Islamic movements etc as being propagated by the mainstream medias back home in malaysia. being a parent, she is concerned about my beings which is normal. but i really hate the use of extremism or the word extremist (in the medias) which is usually associated with muslims and pronounced with a negative connotation. i could not elaborate this any further, but lately i keep on hearing people ( of authority) reminding us of our duty as students to the country, society and not to forget, our religion ( it really annoys me whenever 'religion' is being put at the end of the sentence). oh, please...we have enough social problems with malaysian youths that i sometimes think 'their' (some external influences, not referring to family and friends) worrying about anyone of us involved in islamic movement is not relevant, REALLY.
o Allah, please guide me to the right path, please grant me patience in dealing with the questions in my heart...
so, getting back to where i started; i asked my mum , what did she mean by 'intentionally not wanting to call home'?- i have never had problems with any one of my parents, why should i have an intention as such? shockingly, she replied ; "well, you know, there are such organizations that when you joined them, you just shun from your family, it just happens all the time... " i was quite unspoken for a few moments, gathering my strength, i told her ; "insha Allah i will never let myself be a part of such thing, don't you trust me?" it was indeed difficult when it comes to your parents questioning your accountability. Alhamdulillah, for me it is not a hard one. it's just about me explaining my wherebouts for the last two weeks in details eventhough i've consulted my parents before embarking on my journey to programmes . but thinking back, how on earth does she get the idea of organizations that deprive anyone from his/her family? i know that she literally meant organizations related to extremism, maybe some Islamic movements etc as being propagated by the mainstream medias back home in malaysia. being a parent, she is concerned about my beings which is normal. but i really hate the use of extremism or the word extremist (in the medias) which is usually associated with muslims and pronounced with a negative connotation. i could not elaborate this any further, but lately i keep on hearing people ( of authority) reminding us of our duty as students to the country, society and not to forget, our religion ( it really annoys me whenever 'religion' is being put at the end of the sentence). oh, please...we have enough social problems with malaysian youths that i sometimes think 'their' (some external influences, not referring to family and friends) worrying about anyone of us involved in islamic movement is not relevant, REALLY.
o Allah, please guide me to the right path, please grant me patience in dealing with the questions in my heart...
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